Day Job Blues

In which our Diva continues to negotiate with the Universe for more favorable terms on this Being A Grownup deal

Just got a very, very apologetic call from the place where I had a second interview last week. To the extent that it was obviously really, really close. (Not to mention they've already had to go through this process twice in less than a year, so I'm sure they don't want to burn any bridges in case this one doesn't last either.)

I'm disappointed, but also weirdly ambivalent. It's a BIG job. And I'll confess to having some slight internal cold feet for that reason after the second interview, when it started feeling a little realer. Office of Doom might be stingy with the PTO days, but there's very seldom a specific day/time where I just plain can't take a half-day, or make up the hours later, or whatever, in order to make an audition or gig. Granted, I haven't tested that a lot (yet), but they're generally pretty flexible. (It helps that they're mildly terrified of my leaving. Maybe not even mildly at this point.)

With the responsibilities of this job, there may very well have been some painful conflicts, because there would have been times when I absolutely had to be there. I also got the sense that I'd have more time off in general (while specifics were not discussed, they did mention vacation, personal and sick days as separate commodities), but have been getting slightly apprehensive about possible limitations on when I could take it.

It would also have been a fairly significant pay cut. Not unsurvivable, but certainly noticeable.

I dunno. Maybe just rationalizing. Doesn't matter. For the moment, still at Office of Doom, and now lifting the temporary moratorium on auditioning for new stage stuff (since I don't have to worry about going crazy trying to transition to a new job with rehearsals going on too).

I have the entirely irrational but nonetheless strong sense that this is how it's supposed to be, and something else is going to fall into place soon. I'm choosing to believe it for the moment, because why the heck not?